I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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