have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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