but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I would ride that face into the sunset
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize