....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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