Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Randomize
