Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize