Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
