I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Can't talk, ducks in the car
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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