I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Too much gin, very little bucket
I checked into jail on foursquare
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
