I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
