i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
