is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I just found a bag of teeth...
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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