hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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