I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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