? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Randomize
