you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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