my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
