He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
