belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
