I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
and you fell through a lawn chair
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
