Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
