i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Randomize
