I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
