Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
