3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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