***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
