On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I am naked and annoyed.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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