plz talk dirty to me
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
