Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
