Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I just had sex on a roof
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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