chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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