i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
