Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Randomize
