he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Randomize
