operation harelip BJ is a go
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
