I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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