Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
