i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
