you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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