oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
