he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
