Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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