that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
