She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
