that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
