my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
