My cat gives me a boner
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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