found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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