I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
