So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
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